Homeward Bound
by mandyg67
Summary: Zola comes home to tell her mother about her latest big purchase.
1. Chapter 1

Zola Shepherd-Grey was nervous as she entered her family's home and searched for her mother. She wasn't sure how her mother would take her news. She found her mother in her office, pouring over her medical research.

"Mom, where's Chris?"

"He's napping, sweetie," said Meredith as she looked up from her work.

"Mom, you are the baby whisperer. I haven't been able to get Chris to go down for more than a week."

"You have to be strict about naps, Zozo. And when the baby gets here, you're really going to need Chris taking a nap every day," Meredith advised as she glanced at her daughter's pregnant body. She was six months pregnant.

"Tomorrow, I'll watch you put him down for a nap and see how you do it."

"That's a good plan," chuckled Meredith. "Any success with your house-hunting trip?"

"Yes, Mom," Zola said with a big smile, "We got the house."

"Tell me about the house."

Zola twirled her hair nervously.

"Zozo, is it a fixer-upper? I would be happy to lend you some money if you need it."

"No, Mom, nothing like that. We didn't just get a house. We got the house, the house Daddy built on Bainbridge Island."

Meredith stared at her daughter. "Seriously?"

"Yes, Mom. When we moved out of that house, I promised myself I would buy that house when I grew up. I wanted that house for my children. And now, Ben and I are going to have two children to grow up in that house."

"How did you manage to buy that house?"

"When I came back to Seattle after medical school, I went by the house and introduced myself to the current owners. I explained that my father built the house for my family, and that I wanted to buy it back if ever they wanted to sell it. And I gave them all my contact information, and I told them I would touch base with them every year. And that's what I've done. And this year, they told me that that they were moving out-of-state and wanted to sell, and Ben and I just signed a contract to buy the house."

"Were you made at me for selling the house?" Meredith asked quietly.

"No, Mom. I know you loved dad, and it was painful living there after he died. It was painful for me, too. I thought that when I grew up, it wouldn't be painful to live there. And I thought Dad would be happy if he knew his grandchildren were living in the house."

Meredith felt tears rolling down her cheeks. "I'm sure Daddy would be happy to have Chris and the new baby living in the house. He always wanted that house to be full of love and laughter."

"Is it okay with you, Mom? I do want you to be comfortable coming over to our house."

"It's fine with me, sweetie."

"Really fine or Meredith fine?"

"Zozo, it's really fine. It's not like you expect me to move in. I'm going to stay here, in my house although I'm going to miss you and your family."

"Mom, it's been great living at home with you. And you've been really patient while Ben and I have told you that we were looking for a house."

"Zozo, I love having you and Ben and Chris here. You could stay here forever as far as I'm concerned."

"Mom, with the new baby we need more room than we have here. And Ellie wants to live here when she graduates medical school. And what if Aunt Cristina wants to retire?"

"I don't think Aunt Cristina will retire anytime soon. And I could renovate the attic for Ellie. Aunt Lexie used to live there."

"Mom, we need to move out. We need our own place. But will you be willing to visit us? Maybe even sleep there to babysit if we're both on call or take a vacation?"

"I assume you want me to be honest."

Zola nodded.

"I can visit you there. It's really sweet that you want to live in Daddy's house. But I don't know if I can sleep there. I could always have Chris and the new baby sleep here in this house, so there' no problem with babysitting."

"Okay."

"When do you close on the house?"

"Six weeks. That way we can take title and do some painting and maybe some other work on the house before the baby is born."

"That makes sense."

Meredith stood up and went over to Zola and gave her a big hug. "Just remember, sweetheart, no matter what you do, I love you, and I'll support you. So if you want to move into our old house, it's fine with me. Just don't ask me to sleep there."

"You still miss Daddy."

"Yes."

"So do I, but I'll feel closer to him in the house he built for us."

"He would like it. Have you told anyone else about buying our old house?"

"No. I didn't want to tell you until I had a contract."

"Okay."


	2. Chapter 2

At lunchtime the next day, Meredith looked for Amelia in the cafeteria. She smiled when she saw her, and then she sat down beside her with her lunch. She went straight to the point. "Did Zola tell you what she did?"

"Meredith, you sound as if she's a teen-ager who just pierced her nose."

Meredith smiled and nodded.

"What did she do?"

"She bought the house, Derek's house."

Amelia stared at her. "The house on Bainbridge Island?"

"There is only one house that Derek built, and that's it."

"Derek would be thrilled to have his grandchildren living in that house." Amelia smiled, thinking about her brother.

"Do you think I did the wrong thing in selling the house?" Meredith asked.

"No. Living there was painful. That house was so full of Derek."

"So was mine, you know. Derek actually lived with me longer in my mother's house than in the one he built. It took him so long to get that house built. It was a labor of love."

"Zola always was a daddy's girl. It's really sweet that she wanted the house."

"Now I know why she's been living with me so long. I always wondered why she and Ben didn't want a house of their own. Not that I don't love having them live with me. She was waiting for the owners to sell her the house."

"Meredith, she could have bought another house and then sold it when the owners were ready to sell. She loves you," Amelia pointed out.

"She loves having a free babysitter."

"Like mother, like daughter."

"You were always more than a babysitter, Amelia."

"Thanks, but, to be honest, it didn't always feel that way."

"I'm sorry."

"There's nothing to be sorry about. I love your kids. I was happy to be their babysitter. I was grateful for every moment I spent with them. "

"They all adore you."

"But Zola didn't come and tell me about buying the house."

"She knows it's painful for you, too."

"Those months you spent in San Diego, I barely spent any time in that house. I preferred sleeping in the oncall rooms at the hospital. Being alone in that big house was awful."

"I'm sorry."

"It's not your fault."

"It is for leaving you alone there."

"I never blamed you for leaving. I knew it was painful to be there. And then when I found out about Ellie, I knew why you couldn't stay."

"I just wonder if I was fair to Zola. Bailey was too young to really understand what was going on. He's too young to remember Derek. It breaks my heart that Derek was such a wonderful dad, but Bailey doesn't remember him and Ellie never met him. He never even knew I was pregnant. But Zola was such a daddy's girl."

"Zola is fine. She's a great doctor and a great mother. She has a happy marriage. We both did a great job with her. And Bailey and Ellie know about Derek. We've kept his memory alive for them."

"Zola's certainly not dark and twisty. But I wonder what she thinks of our stay in San Diego. You know we've never talked about it."

"You can talk about it now. She loves Ben. I'm sure she understands that you were devastated after Derek died."

"She told me she knew it was painful for me to stay in that house. I can't believe I have to go back there. I told her I would, for her."

"You're a great mom. You'd do anything for her."

"I never thought about her when I sold the house."

"Sure you did. You thought about what you needed to be a good mom, and what she needed then was a good mom who could focus on her kids, not always thinking about her dead husband."

"I still think about him all the time."

"You loved him."

"I miss him every day. And he would have loved to have Zola and her children live in that house."

"So it's good."

"I will have to come to terms with it."

"Like I said, you'd do anything for Zola."

"I told her I wouldn't sleep there. If she needed an overnight babysitter, the kids can stay with me."

"That's fair. It's not like she's losing out on free babysitting."

"Yeah. I love being a grandmother. Derek would have loved being a grandfather."

"That's for sure."

Later that day, Meredith approached Zola and asked her to join her for dinner.

"Sure, Mom. Ben can watch Chris."

The two made their way to the Emerald City Bar, which was still called Joe's even though Joe had long retired. His sons tended bar now. They both ordered cheeseburgers with fries.

"So what's up, Mom? Are you upset about me buying the house?"

"No, sweetheart. It's actually very sweet that you want the house. Daddy worked so hard on it. He would love that you and your family are living."

"What about you, Mom?"

"I think it's great. The house will be full of love and laughter, just like Daddy wanted."

"So why did you want to have dinner with me?"

"Do I need a reason?"

"No, I love having dinner with you, Mom. But I think there's something up."

"I just wanted to talk to you."

"About what?"

Meredith thought for a moment and then decided to go for it. "About San Diego."

"What do you mean?"

"It's been twenty-five years, and we've never talked about the time we spent in San Diego after dad died."

"Mom, there was no need to talk about it."

"I feel like I made some mistakes. I sold the house when you obviously wanted to stay there. And I took you and Bailey to San Diego, leaving everyone we knew behind. And we've never talked about it. I don't know what you thought about it. Bailey was just a baby, but you were old enough to miss your friends."

"Mom, I loved our stay in San Diego. Don't you remember how you explained it to me?"

"No, I don't."

"I still remember what you said, word for word. You said, Zola, we are in mourning for Daddy. We miss him so much. We are always going to miss him because we loved him, and he loved us. But we need to go away and spend some time together, just the three of us. I'm not going to work, so we'll spend lots of time together. We'll go some place sunny and spend time at the beach. We'll make some new memories and figure out what it's like to be a family of three, always remembering Daddy with love."

"That's what I said?"

"Yes. And then after we'd been in San Diego for a few months, you told me I was going to have another brother or sister. That Daddy had given us a special gift before he died."

Meredith smiled. "Ellie was a very special gift."

"I always thought so. I wanted a baby sister so much."

"I know. You told me so every day after I told you I was pregnant."

"I can be persistent."

"Yes, you can. That's a good trait in a surgeon."

"Thanks, Mom."

"So you didn't mind our trip to San Diego?"

"No, I loved it. It was so peaceful, and it was so great to spend so much time with you."

"I was very sad then."

"So was I, Mom. It was normal to be sad. We missed Daddy, but it wasn't so painful at the beach. And you took us to Legoland and Disney."

"I wanted you to have happiness in your life."

"I did, Mom."

"Did you miss Aunt Amelia? And Sofia?"

"Sure. But I knew we'd see them some day. I just loved being able to spend all day every day with you."

"How did you feel about going home to Seattle?"

"Fine. It was time to go home. Ellie took a lot of your time, and it was great to go home and see our family and friends. But I enjoyed our San Diego time."

"Thank you. It was very therapeutic for me, spending time on the beach, spending my days with you and Bailey. I was just a mom with two kids hanging out at the beach. No one knew my story. No one felt sorry for me. I just worried that it wasn't good for you."

"No, it was great. It's why I love the beach. I always try to go to the beach on my vacations. I have such happy memories of the beach, Mom."

"I'm glad," Meredith said, smiling.


	3. Chapter 3

Amelia was waiting outside OR2. She saw her niece emerge after scrubbing out of surgery and pounced. "Zola, I brought my famous bean salad to work for lunch. Let's have lunch together."

Zola smiled and followed her aunt to her office. After her aunt served lunch to both of them, Zola turned to Amelia and asked, "So Aunt Amelia, what's up?"

Amelia decided not to beat around the bush, so she went straight to the point. "You have really freaked your mother out."

"She told you about my new house."

"Yes." Amelia met Zola's eyes. "She's now rethinking whether she made the right decision in selling the house."

"I told her I understood why she sold the house. I just want to live there now. It's not about what my mother did twenty-five years ago. It's what I want to do now."

"Why do you want to live there?" Amelia asked. She was curious.

"I remember my dad telling me about how he found the land when he first moved to Seattle and how he loved the view. How Mom built him a house of candles there. And he built it for her and for me. He put a lot of himself into the house, and I want to live there. I think he would like having his daughter and grandchildren living in the house."

"Yes, he would like that. He loved that house. But what about your mom?"

"She told me she's fine with my living there."

Amelia stared at Zola. "Your mother and the word fine do not go together."

"I'm taking her at her word. Besides, twenty-five years is along time ago."

"If it was really all that long ago, you wouldn't want to live there."

"Maybe. But I do want to live there, and Ben agrees. It's a great house. It has a fabulous view."

"I know. I lived there for more than a year."

"Are you okay with my buying the house?"

"Yes. But I just lived in the guest room. It was never my house, not even when your mom left me alone there."

"It must have been hard for you when Mom left with us," Zola observed. This was the first time she ever thought about what their flight from Seattle was like for her Aunt Amelia.

"I understood why she left."

"Really?"

"Yes." Amelia thought for a moment, and she decided that Zola deserved the truth. "After your mom left, I cleaned the house. I emptied the trash from all the rooms. When I emptied the trashcan from your mom's bathroom, I saw two pregnancy tests, both positive. So I knew she couldn't bear to be pregnant in Seattle, where everyone would feel pity for her as they saw her get more and more pregnant."

"You knew?"

"I never told your mom or anyone else. But I knew. And I knew to keep the information to myself. Your Aunt Callie had wanted to hire a detective to locate your mom; she would have been more determined to do so if she knew that your mom was pregnant."

"Why didn't she hire the detective?" Zola was curious; Aunt Callie had never mentioned that she might hire a detective. In fact, Aunt Callie like all her mother's friends never spoke about that time.

"Richard Webber said your mom was doing what she knew how to do – flee. And that she was not a missing person; she had left a note. She was a responsible woman, and she would take good care of you and Bailey."

"She did. You know, we've never talked about that time."

"You were so young, and I was just so happy when you returned to Seattle. I was always willing to answer any questions that you had, but I didn't think it would be helpful for me to ask you about that time. I know what it's like to lose a father, and you seemed so happy when you got back to Seattle."

"I missed you."

"And I missed you very much. I was thrilled when you returned to Seattle."

"It was time to come home. Mom needed help. She could devote herself to me and Bailey before Ellie was born, but afterwards we needed more attention than she could give."

Amelia had always wondered what happened with Zola and Bailey when Meredith gave birth. "Was it scary for you when your mom gave birth?"

"A little. Mom and Dad had both trained me in dialing 911 for emergencies. When we were in San Diego, as mom got more and more pregnant, she would do drills practicing calling 911. She told me that it was possible that there would be an emergency with the baby, but that all I needed to do was call 911. She explained about childbirth, and she told me that she had the best doctor and the best hospital, and that everything would be okay. And I trusted her."

"So you called 911?"

"Yes. Mom had a placental abruption; she told me about that the first time I told her I was pregnant. She wanted to be sure I knew my family history. But then all I knew was that she felt a pain in her belly, and she started bleeding. I asked her if I should call 911, and she said yes. I called, and the ambulance came very soon, and it took all of us to the emergency room. I remember a social worker told me that I was a very smart girl, calling 911. And they put Bailey and me in a daycare center while they took Mom to surgery. The nurse told me when Ellis was born that both Mom and Ellis were fine, and she brought us to see Mom and Ellis. We stayed at the hospital day care center until Uncle Alex came."

"I was thrilled when I learned about Ellis was born just like I was thrilled to hear about you and Bailey. And I was even more thrilled when I learned you were all coming back to Seattle."

"It was quite the homecoming," Zola said with a smile. "Everyone was so happy to see us. When we left, people pitied us and kept asking how we were doing. When we came back, people were happy and wanted to talk about Ellis, not Daddy."

"You were gone for more than nine months. Your mom spent her maternity leave in San Diego."

"I know. Grandma came to help. And Aunt Callie and Sofia visited. Once Uncle Alex came, we weren't isolated any more."

"Was that better?"

"It was what we needed with the new baby. But, to be honest, I loved the time in San Diego with Mom and Bailey. Mom had explained it to us, that we needed to mourn Daddy, but that being in a new place where it would just be the three of us would help. And Mom was with us 24/7. We went to the beach almost every day. That's why I go to the beach on my vacations. I think it was good for us to leave Seattle and make some new memories."

"Have you told Bailey and Ellie about the house?"

"I told Bailey that I was interested in buying the house after I first spoke to the owners. But I haven't mentioned it to Ellie. I'll tell her when she comes home."

"Your Mom will calm down, I'm sure."

"I hope so." Zola's pager buzzed, so she went to leave. "Thanks for lunch, Aunt Amelia. It's sweet that you worry about Mom."

"You're welcome."


End file.
